I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
