Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
