this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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