i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
