"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
