it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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