chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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