Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
