I want to stick my p in your. b.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
