small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
