Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
