Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
