I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
