I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
