Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
