careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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