Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
