i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
