Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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