Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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