He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
