im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
