Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
