Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
