Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
