After last night, I could never be a politician.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
