I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You left your underwear on the fireplace
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize
