just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
