Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
