VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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