Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
