Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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