hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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