i love accidental penises.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
