I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
