these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
