so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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