You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
