i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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