the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
