My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
