Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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