just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
