Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Randomize