When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
