I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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