a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
