I must be too annoying 4 u.
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize