I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
