What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
