I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
